Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

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Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

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how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

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Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

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what did batman tell robin before they got into the batmobile? -let's get in the batmobile!

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

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a Jew had a small nose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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