What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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I treat women like I treat dead bodies. With respect.

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Mind magic for fuck ups: Did you know you can train your dog to magically arrive by saying YOUR name! Just tell it what your name is a lot and voila! Moral: made me laugh, fuck the rest of you XD

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Why did the chicken contact Michael Jackson? To get to the other side.

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

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Two tomatoes are crossing the road. Suddenly one of them gets hit by a car. He goes "AGH!"

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Roses are red violets are blue I have altimers cheese on toast Srry bout the spelling. I couldn't REMEMBER!

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Holocost jokes arent even that funny, Anne Frank-ly they annoy me.

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404: Anti-joke not found.

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Q.What did the German say when he walked into the bar? A.Ich möchte ein Bier bitte. Das würde mich viel besser fühlen. Meine Frau ist gerade gestorben, weil ich sie zu Tode prügeln, und ich bin ein Alkoholiker.

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What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

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What do you get when an elephant and a pig have baby? Nothing, mating between animals must take place between animals of the same species, thus making it impossible to cross these two animals

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

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Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

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Rick Santorum 2012

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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Asians

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Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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