Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

a man walks into a bar several people leave as they can see the potential danger in the situation. - the man (also so known as a hippo) was Matt Ross

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know but some black man is starting up his deep-frier on the other side

What do you call A potato who is covered in red refrigerators and is known as a potato. Fallafal

Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Her father beat her

What's the best part about having sex with twenty four year olds? There's twenty of them.

Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

Why did the downy jump off a cliff? I told him to.

Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

Q. Whats black and rhymes with Snoop? A. Dr Dre

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? statutory rape

A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

Asian women drivers...

I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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