A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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When is Florida not the sunshine state? At night.

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why was the old man on the ground he fell

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

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- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

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What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

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Life is like a box of chocolates! It sucks if you have diabetes

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Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

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How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

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wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

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Why was the mime crying? Her husband died.

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Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

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A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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