destiny

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Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

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Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

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you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

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What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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A special needs student walks into a girls change room, and is then escorted out unaware that what he did was socially unacceptable.

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What's worse than finding a dead fly in your soup? Finding your soup in a dead fly

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What? Why?

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A terrorist gets on a plane. He has a pleasant flight and gets off in a new country.

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- Knock, knock - Who's there? - Police - I'm not home!

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Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

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- knock knock. - Who's There? - Steve. - Steve who? - Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

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A horse walked into a bar and ordered a drink. It was nothing out of the ordinary because the Everett-Wheeler interpretation of quantum mechanics is correct and he lived in a parallel universe in which the roles of humans and horses are reversed.

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roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

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Why did the gang jump a man for his blue jeep? Answer The gang wanted a blue jeep.

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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Your mother lives so loosely that she has several terminal diseases and only has 3 weeks to live.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis

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Your grandma's cookies.

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You are so down to earth, and never confuse that with "simple minded".

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Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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