So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

Yo mama is so fat she died

Suppose an American, an Indian, a dinosaur, and a leprechaun are on a plane together. Which one would be the first to chug a 7 pound bottle of coke? The situation is too unlikely, with the odds of it occurring being less than 1%, therefore the question cannot be answered accurately.

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

Knock Knock Whos There Policeman Policeman who Please open then door your fathers been in a terrible car accident

why was the boy sad? because his penis was stapled to a coffee table

Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGH

Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? The one from the farm across the street. Can Randy come play outside?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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