what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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What did the wall say to the other wall? I didn't say anything because it isn't living and it can't talk because it is impossible.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it lacked the requisite musculature to facilitate locomotion

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Who shit in my garden?

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How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You ask him politely.

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What do you say when a black person is walking through wal-mart? Prisoner

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Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Why didn't the sperm cell cross the road? It died from the intense heat.

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What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

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Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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Xbox One

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What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

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Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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It's about 3 days from Mother's Day. What do you get her? Nothing. Nothing is a very powerful thing. hehe thats what she said.

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Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

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Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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Did you hear about the guys who were going to France? Well they are not going anymore.

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Help I'm being raped!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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