There was a 4-car accident in Mexico today. 87 people died.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

George Bush.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock, Who's There? The The Who? YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Whatever their name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A smart kid just answered a question in class, a blonde girl then says "Nerd, your always answering all the questions". The teacher then says "Hey thats not nice, he could be your boss one day." The smart kid quickly replies "Highly unlikely, i do not plan on being a pimp when i grow up".

thumb_up thumb_down +6

i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops