- Anti Joke

What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing. Cats can't talk.

How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

How can you tell that the Filipino presidential candidate Grace Poe is an alien? From her extra set of retractable jaws and highly acidic body fluids.

What has stripes, isn't a virgin, and has golden hands? I don't know I asked you first.

what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Roses are red

Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

Ron Paul for President!

What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

Q: Why do some women insist they don't have penises or testicles? All humans have penises and testicles! A: These women have been brainwashed by feminism. It's quite sad, really.

Q: Why didn't Jack go up the hill? A: He had prior engagements.

No, what you are saying, is that you have lost hope, one of the fundamental rules in creating such a society, is becoming the kind of person, in our case a man that has a notion of free will, the willpower to follow his own vision, the kind of man with a ideology so strong that it defies the rules imposed upon us by society. Then, you do neither go around breaking said rules, nor as you do, seek out people. No, if your ideology is better, stronger and greater than what society has imposed upon us since birth, then those we consider the strong, will seek people like us. You know the basics, humans as a whole are "monkey see monkey do", but for me at least, people of true value, do not follow others, but their own belief, values concepts of life and whatnot, this is the reason I from time to time come here and "Humiliate myself", people hate my guts, I know it, acknowledge it, until it fazes me no more, then every so often a few people like it. And there you got the core of what you are conveying, individuality based on self respect and respect for others, those people that sought people like me, had this value down at heart. Again that is not something you can teach others, how to think for themselves, no. You know how it is, we live in a society where people that love themselves and respect their own work are looked down upon by others, until many decide it is not worth the effort. And if that is what society has created, then you going around promising others a better lifestyle trough following their "heart", is just going to either have them abuse you, or worse, worship you. If you succeed at having people see you as a goddamn God, then it only takes a fucking generation, your fucking lifetime, before someone takes over, starts passing on drugs or alcohol, and claiming you where a God, and then you wasted your whole life into conveying something greater, but ended up creating what people like us hate, a religion indoctrination that destroys the human part that is able to think for itself and respect its own decisions. The problem with free will, is that you can also freely surrender it, and when the so called "greatest nation on the world" are war "in the name of God" against Satan, while the other is fighting for Allah, against, SHATAM... Then it should not take much more than a monkey to figure out humanity is simply fighting one another, in this case probably over a fucking translation error. And if this is what the world most powerful nation can offer, while their elitism assures that politicians live as kings, while the people suffer, all while "Gods nation" cannot even win a war over what is considered "camels and stones" Then you should know that there is still much hope, that people such as us can start even the smallest spark, of a better society, and that people will seek us out. But our kind cannot be made, only unmade, it is easy to surrender one`s personal values and become someone else. And when you claim to be me, and spread your weird values on a fucking anti-joke side on the worlds most broken site, then what is really left of you? And if you cannot stand against the tide, then what different is what you convey, that to what the mainstream media, politicians and religion spread? Moral: Get ready for a load of thumbs downs, people most have surrendered their values and free will, its hard to stand against the tide, but as long as people such as I and hopefully you stand strong, even if in seclusion, then we only need to ignite the spark in our equals in order to succeed, and we might be few, but together and as individuals strong, we can never truly be defeated.

Women. One of the genders a human can be.

Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

John: Knock Knock! Bill: Who's there John: John Bill: Oh hey John, come in

Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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