Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

what starts with an f and ends with a uck? firetruck!!

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

a guy walked into my house and asked "why do you do the beep test every arvo?" i suddenly replied, im matt minors i get chicks

Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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