Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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What do you calk a couple of friends hanging out? An intimate get-together.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are trapped on a desert island. As they investigate the island to find food and shelter they find a magic lamp. Together they rub the lamp and sure enough a genie appears and tells them he will grant each of them a single wish. The brunette goes first and wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house, where her husband and children are waiting for her. She is happy that her ordeal is behind her and to see her loved ones. The redhead goes next and also wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house. She is not married and has no kids, but she has 2 cats. She is happy to be through her ordeal and to see her beloved pets. The blonde went last and also wished to be sent home. The genie clapped his hands and she appeared back in her house. She wasn't married, and had no kids or pets, but she was still happy that her ordeal was over.

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Q: Why was the prostitute's mouth sore? A: She had multiple cavities due to poor dental hygiene.

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if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

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so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

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Why was the little girl crying? Her parents got divorced yesterday.

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which one does not belong light bulb i have read an agree to the terms of service view terms of service submit

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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What is white and smells like wood? White painted wood

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Knock, knock. After a couple minutes of waiting the man knows that no one is home and leaves.

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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what's the difference between dodo and doodoo doodoo is still around for you to see

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A Fat Kenyan

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Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

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Once there was a girl named Andrea

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Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

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how do u get to your favorite chinese restaurant? wok.

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There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops