There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

A bus crashes and everybody dies.

CIA? You? Are you a CIA agent? Wow!

A Pakistani news reader.

What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

The WNBA

Q: How did the black man cross the Atlantic? A: He flew with an airliner, a large fixed-wing aircraft for transporting passengers and cargo.

a man walks into a bar and has a drink james

What did the Christian say to the Muslim? Our faiths are actually derived from the same Judeo base.

A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

Q: Whats the longest book in the library A: Understanding Women

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Once upon a time there was a chicken...the chicken married a dog. They dog and the chicken had little baby dog-chickens then the daddy dog killed the mummy chicken by eating her. The baby doggie-chicks saw and tried to run away but the daddy dog ate them too. Moral of the story: Marry someone who can't eat you ;)

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

And more;

There would not be any me in we, you would have to hijack a media station, you would instantly be branded terrorists, and even if you where not, do you believe that you could have used the media in order to spread individuality, or would you simply have sought to control the masses like the rest? I am not saying that television is wrong, I am saying that as long as there are not enough people willing to think for themselves, and remain loyal to us and themselves, something which we failed at when we where at our greatest peak, then we are all media zombies eventually, and I do not mind, complacency is better than a constant struggle for survival.

Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

mental kid

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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