What was the only animal to not board the ark in pairs? Loads of animals because it didn't happen.

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Why does Bugs Bunny have big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Q: What do you call it when you get shot in the face 20 times with a shotgun? A:Nothing, you're dead. Q:What do we call it when you get shot 20 times with a shotgun? A: A blessing.

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

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what goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow on it? bubble gum!

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What did the priest say to the Atheist when he walked into the church? How are you?

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Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand. QUACK!!!

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A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

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What happens when you drop a baby? It falls.

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Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

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Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

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So a Jewish, Hispanic, and Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "aren't you tired of this?"

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How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the gay guy's house knock knock who's there? the chicken

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What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

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Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

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Why was the man running? He needed to get somewhere fast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops