What did the horse get for Christmas? Starvation and neglect because its owner has been dead for three months of old age and he was a raging, angry, achoholic so no one cared if hey was dead and/or bothered to see if he was alive

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hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, killed 6's family and made him watch...

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Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

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What's red and smells like metal? A tricycle. It's covered in blood.

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What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

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hard cheese

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knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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What is black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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How do you get a one armed polock out of a tree? You assess the situation and get a ladder the proper size to reach him, making sure the ladder is stable.

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Knock-knock? Who's there? I... I dunno I was planning on thinking of a joke before you said who's there, but I ran out of time.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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"Doctor, Doctor! I feel like I'm a dinner roll!" Yes, well that's a side effect of your brain cancer.

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Your mama's p*ssy is so stank, she should probably consult her physician as she may have an easily treatable infection.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops