The jets are a good team..

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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An underage man walks into a bar. He then was shot and kicked out of the bar. An overage person found the body. What age is he? Normal Age

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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knock knock whose there cash! cash who i don't want any but i'd like some peanuts

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor dog

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What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

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what is better than your entire family getting brutally murdered applesauce

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A elephant drowns when it was swimming, why did this happen? Who cares its already dead!

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? The tea he was drinking was at an unsuitable temperature for consumption resulting in the scalding of his mouth.

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how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

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1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

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What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

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why did the Chinese man fail the driving test because he had no previous driving experience and wasn't prepared for the test

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whats blue and can fly? a red robin i lied about being blue By RT so u believe me

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There are 3 types of people in this world; people who can count, and people who can't

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Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

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Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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