Bum: Excuse me, can you spare some change? Rich man: No

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What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

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Moral

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Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

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Why did the plane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot

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When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

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what is racecar backwards in reverse

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Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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If black guys really have big packages, why are there standards so low, they prefer fat girls? I don't know, but prejudice and racism is wrong dickhead.

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Why is Sophie incapable of Lifeguarding correctly? Because she only has limited use of all of her senses , especially hearing,

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What looks red and smells like barf? Depends on how you look at the situation.

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

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knock knock who's there? hope

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Check out page 4016 :)

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Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

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I wonder if God looks at the Earth all these years later and thinks, Man, I really went overboard with the water, didn't I?

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What is the best Anti-Joke ever? Your Mom. :(

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Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

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There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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