What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

Your existance.

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

Dakota Fanning

What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

What is a bad thing to see and is attached to a boy's body. The middle finger u dumb ass!

what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

Why did the man not come out of the closet? He wanted to stay in narnia.

A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...