what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

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What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, killed 6's family and made him watch...

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

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hard cheese

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Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

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Bob and his family were looking forward to going to an all inclusive holiday to Spain. When they got on the plane, a bomb went off, causing Bob to realise that he was never going to see his family again, and that they were about to suffer a horrific, painful death.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

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Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Hey, how much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to drown as a result of climate change.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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What is black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

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Your mama's p*ssy is so stank, she should probably consult her physician as she may have an easily treatable infection.

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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