What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

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What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

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Penis-biter

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What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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Knock knock Who's there? (Punch the listner in the face)

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How do you get a tower to move? Hit it with a plane.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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Once upon of time there was 2 boys named Bucky and Thorn. They were best of friends and always came up with amusing adventures. So one day, during summer time before high school senior year, Bucky and Thorn went to go hiking on the mountain called Mt. Saint Lasik. It was the tallest mountain of the city. The city was called "The City of Dreams" because everyone had a dream that one day they will accomplish their goals. Well Bucky had a goal and his goal was to be the youngest to ever climb the mountain. However, Thorn was jealous because he as 11 toes. Since he can't hike they decided to go camping at Walala National Park. One day they saw a big huge bear named Pervus. Pervus told them that they were not allowed to be there. Thorn told Pervus to shut the hell up because he can't hike mountains. A girl came suddenly showed up. It was a girl named Sally. She was half black, white, Spanish, ad French, and she could sweet talk bears. Pervus said "Now it's time to boogey woogey woogey" and began dancing like a maniac. Police arrived. Officer Caleb Johnson was in the scene to investigate. "Where were you at the night of April 24th?" To which Bucky replied "To what do I owe pleasure of speaking?" Harry, his front door neighbor stole the cop car and drove off to New Guinea. God knows how or why Harry showed up. Coincidentally, Sally decided it was time to leave. Everyone left utterly confused. The End.

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Once upon a time there was a chicken...the chicken married a dog. They dog and the chicken had little baby dog-chickens then the daddy dog killed the mummy chicken by eating her. The baby doggie-chicks saw and tried to run away but the daddy dog ate them too. Moral of the story: Marry someone who can't eat you ;)

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Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? Nothing.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

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Chinese men having large penis.

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When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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What happens when you mix bath salts, marijiuana, and crack cocaine and proceed to inject it into your body in some manner? You have one of the biggest trips of your life in which it will ware off and you will proceed with your life

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A man was running from drug dealers When they had him cornered he ran towards the sun and died

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What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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How many babies can you breast feed? 2

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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