What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness. Oh come on in, I would love to learn more about your religion.

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A mermaid walks into a bar, but she has no legs, so she flops over and proceeds to drag herself into the bar.

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza has cheese on it.

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

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What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

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A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

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An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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How did the stuntman die? He was gored by a buffalo on a trip to Yellowstone.

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops