I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

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If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5 then all together you have $10. It was announced that the obverse portrait of Alexander Hamiliton would be replaced by the portrait of an undecided woman, starting in the year 2020. If you wait long enough, you can exchange the $10 for the new $10 bill.

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Yeah i'm into fitness, Fitness whole pizza in my mouth.

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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What is a dog's favorite color? None,dogs have colorblindness.

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Once upon a time Jimmy was walking home from school. Jimmy was then confronted by a a pedophile so he suddenly ate himself.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The chicken saw greater opportunities to find food on the other side

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

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How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and his problem is destroying his family.

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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How do you make a black man sad? Kill his entire family.

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A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

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Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a barber shop They each ask the barber for haircuts of their preference.

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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Why didn't the cow go to the candy store It had diabetes poor cow :(

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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