Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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What is red? A rock painted red

what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

Q. what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? A. nothing you done told her twice already

What did the suspicious Hunchback say? I've got a hunch.

Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

What does a scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!!

Why doesn't God like fruitcake? Because God doesn't exist.

A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam were having dinner together at a local restaurant. Which caused a group of Republicans sitting nearby to ask for another table.

Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

Once upon a time there was a boy who got ran over by a truck. No one cared.

A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

what is the difference between a car salesman and a lawyer? a car salesman sells cars to people while a lawyer is an expert in law.

There was a hundred dollar note lying flat on the ground. The homeless guy didn't pick it up and walked on because he didn't see it.

Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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