What's red, blue & green all over?

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

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What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

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Two Chavs jump off a clift who wins? Neither the sport of Tomb stoning is considered non competitive much like jogging

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What's comfy and easy to wear? Shorts.

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Why did Sally fall off the swingset? she had no arms... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He had no distinguishing characteristics whatsoever.

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A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

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"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

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If an orange is orange then why isn't a banana called a yellow? Because the word 'banana' comes from the Arabic word for finger as it obviously resembles a finger. The person that named the orange was equally lazy, but just not Arabic.

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Lol, thats funny, sorry for asking, but is your eye doing better? Was their IQ test the same one you get when you enter their site?

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How do you kill a shark blindfolded? You untie the blindfold.

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andrew wagner

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

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Why was the black man sad? Because his wife and children had been killed in a freak car accident while he had been driving.

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That awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it would.

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why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

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A muslim is working quietly in his 3rd floor apartment complex bedroom. ~~~~ He's been working on high explosives for 8 months now, preparing to kill innocent people.

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Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

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Roses are red violets are blue, I have no pickup line, just Get your tits out

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Knock knock *the family is on vacation and doesn't answer*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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