Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? i know how to make a pizza

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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How do you make a plumber mad? You tell him that his princess is in another castle about a thousand times over 25 years.

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Why is the post under me so funny? Because the boy won't be able to play the x box!

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

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Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

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im not food

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like poems What rhymes with poem?

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Q:What did the wall say to the other wall? A: .

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how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

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whats your name whats the color of the sky whats the oppisite of down

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

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What do you call a rich black man? A auntrapanour who simply enjoys making more money than any average person

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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