An irishman walks out of a pub

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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Sarah Palin

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I hate girls that try to act hard. Like calm down you dont got a dick.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

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Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

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What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can people stop posting grammatically incorrect jokes on here. Half of the sentences do not make sense.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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Why did the mammoth cross the road? For financial reasons.

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A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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