what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

haha ur single hahahahahhahahahhahaahahhaahaha i am 2

thumb_up thumb_down -18

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

thumb_up thumb_down -100

You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -148

How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +181

That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

thumb_up thumb_down +149

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

thumb_up thumb_down +49

187

thumb_up thumb_down +27

170

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -107

knock knock who's there? Kallie Kallie who? sorry, wrong house

thumb_up thumb_down +98

What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops