Once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book ... it goes on forever. Epilogue: the man and son eventually died because a microphone swallowed a frog. THE END P.S.: I didn't close the quotations. P.S.#2: I don't know what ''P.S. stands for. P.S.#3: I didn't close the quotation again.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

thumb_up thumb_down +11

24

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and deaf, so it wold be near impossible for her to do so without seriously injuring herself or another human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

this is not an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black person on a bike? A cyclist.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Moooo

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What did the Rapist say to the Little girl before they got in to the Van? A: Get In the Van

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

DERP

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A neutron walked into a bar and asked "how much for a drink?" The bartender did not reply because a neutron is so small he didn't notice that it even entered.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the wall say to the other wall? I didn't say anything because it isn't living and it can't talk because it is impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

OIO

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops