(warning- this is sort of funny) A mom takes her son to cvs to pick up her pills. Son- Mom whats a pharmacists? Mom- well sweetie its a person who sells people drugs Monday Morning Teacher- Class, did you learn anything over the weekend? Son- Yah, i learned that my mommy has been taking me with her every week, to a person who sells drugs Later that week Teacher- Yes, hi, um your son has told me that you take him to buy drugs with you, i may have to call social services Mom- what? this is a misunderstanding, i go to a pharmacists to buy drugs. That evening Mom-what did you tell your teacher at school Son- you've been telling me that i go with you to buy drugs Mom- baby i need pills, well, because, im sick. Son- ohhhhhhhhhhhh ok At school Teacher- Billy ive called s.s on your mom, u will be living with foster parents Son- ohhhhhhhhhhhh ok Evening Police- ?Ms. Thackery, is this your student. Teacher- Yes Police- His mom has tradgicly died in a pool of tears after finding out YOU called s.s Mom- what? omg. DAMN Police- Im afraid u r under arrest for the cause of his mothers death Class- yayyyyyyy wooo hooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Billy Billy Billy Billy. hip hip hooray Teacher- Damn Son- mommy? Police- ur mommy's dead, sucks right sooooooo here's a box and ten bucks......... go live your life

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What do you call a Rhino and a Lion having sex? Pointless, since they can't reproduce

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

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What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

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roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

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penispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenis

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wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

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Two Black men, one wearing a blue shirt, and one wearing a red shirt, Jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The one in the blue shirt

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Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

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The joke below was so funny I forgot to laugh.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

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What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

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If three men were rowing a rowboat backwards across your front lawn, and six of the four back wheels fell off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? 17 because footballs don't have feathers.

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RUSSIA STRONK RUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA 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STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONKRUSSIA STRONK

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

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Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bag of crap? Quite a bit. The black man is a human male of the Kingdom Animalia, while the bag is an inanimate object. The only similarity between them would be that they both contain organic matter.

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Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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