whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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Why did the Mexican wait outside Home Depot all day? He was hoping to be hired as day-labor to provide for his family.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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An irishman walks out of a pub

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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I hate girls that try to act hard. Like calm down you dont got a dick.

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

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Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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