What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

what do you say when you see a winner weaner

Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

20

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

Arron Glass

Sarah Palin

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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