why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What did the rainbow sun say to the flower-faced elephant? "Want some tea and hamsters?" I'm addicted to acid.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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SNAPPLE!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

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Why did the mammoth cross the road? For financial reasons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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