Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

How many lesbians dose it take to finish a pizza? One or unless she invites some freinds over.

Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

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A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

Have you ever heard the story of Mikey Braford? Every morning when he was little, his father would fill a gym sock with nickels and beat him with it. Mikey has severe attachment disorder and frequent suicidal thoughts.

Why doesnt a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on his head.

Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

What happened to my sunglasses?

How do you kill a blonde? Throw a fridge at her

flavin's head

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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