Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

Why was the boy laughing? Because

How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

a man reads his wife a poem "roses are red, violets are blue, and I love you." the wife talks to her brother asking why he changed the poem he said men do that cause they love you. later that night she got pregnant.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A dozen burly firefighters ready to stick it in your pooper

what did the girl get with her blueberry waffles? blue waffles.

knock knock whos there? nobody

Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

you first

Yo mama smells so bad that she has no friends and killed herself.

Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

why doesn't the werewolf like Ferrari's a werewolf being a mythical creature would most likely not have a preference as to what kind of car he drives because he would not exist

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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