- Anti Joke

I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

Q:where did the little kid go? A:wait, before or after i killed him

what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

A girl cries as she drops a box of uncooked spaghetti noodles, spilling and breaking them onto the floor. She has brittle bone disease.

Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

Well... At that time everyone expected that the only people that knew hypnosis where either "born with the gift from the stars" or was some old beard man that spent "hundreds of years in the mountains".or a wizard or a shamanic priest, or well some guy in a particular stupid suit of sorts, it increased its potency simple as that, as having people stare at me and laugh because "You are not some beardy guru master" is a pretty bad start for the effective use of mass hypnosis. Mono-ideoism actually just means really concentrated focus on a single object or state of mind, the thing about the name (aside from sounding kinda mono-idiotic) is that strong focus alone does NOT lead to a state of relaxation which is one of the prime requirements to achieve a state of trance, I mean try focusing on something really hard and your body produces a huge amount of beta waves, aka stress. All of that is bullshit, but my horrible childhood did leave me with the "gift" to space out pretty quickly, so I learned it pretty fast without really knowing what it was at first.

Holy Fish Sticks Batman! Batman and Robin were at a church and saw a priest eating fish sticks.

What did the librarian say to the three black men in the library? Nothing. Those three men were Harvard graduates and were very respective of libraries, and thier policies.

What happened when they asked Steve if he was feeling blue? He confessed and went to prison for a long time for molesting that poor dog.

A: I've got a new knock knock jokes! Wanna hear it? B: Yeah. A: Oh you first. B: Knock knock! A: Who's there?

What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

get in the car.

what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

how many A.D.D. kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?lets go play!

I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

Q:where did the little kid go? A:wait, before or after i killed him

what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

Woman's Rights

What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

A girl cries as she drops a box of uncooked spaghetti noodles, spilling and breaking them onto the floor. She has brittle bone disease.

Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

I am a joke. I am funny.

British Dentistry

Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

Holy Fish Sticks Batman! Batman and Robin were at a church and saw a priest eating fish sticks.

What did the librarian say to the three black men in the library? Nothing. Those three men were Harvard graduates and were very respective of libraries, and thier policies.

MAKE

What happened when they asked Steve if he was feeling blue? He confessed and went to prison for a long time for molesting that poor dog.

A: I've got a new knock knock jokes! Wanna hear it? B: Yeah. A: Oh you first. B: Knock knock! A: Who's there?

What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??