What do you get when you cross chocolate pudding with your mother's slippers? A spanking.

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Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

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How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family cried about his final days of his life.

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What happens when batman jumps off the top of a building? His fake wings fails and he dies upon impact of the ground.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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How come grilled cheese?

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Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

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Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

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sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

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How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

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knock knock whos there? nobody

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What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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What do you call an Asian man in a car? A motorist.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A dozen burly firefighters ready to stick it in your pooper

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Miškinis gerai prikolina.

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A Mexican, a black man and a Pakistani walk into a bar. Everyone immediately runs out seeing the potential danger in the situation that's about to unfold.

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

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Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

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Why was the women's underwear red?... Because she got stabbed.

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Yo mamas so fat she's over weight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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