Once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book ... it goes on forever. Epilogue: the man and son eventually died because a microphone swallowed a frog. THE END P.S.: I didn't close the quotations. P.S.#2: I don't know what ''P.S. stands for. P.S.#3: I didn't close the quotation again.

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Where would you be unlikely to find a polar bear? In a courtroom.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

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What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

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What do you have Canasta!!! Were not playing canasta you stupid asshole

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This is a joke only for males: Walk into any semi busy public restroom. Stand at the urinal for about 30 seconds to a minute acting as though you cannot find your penis. Make sure you have the attention of at least 2 other urinators and then exclaim quite loudly "I can't find it!" then walk out.

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Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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There was an American, Mexican, and a Chineese man, they were all on a plane about to crash. They all threw off the plane somthing they had a lot of in their country before they died. the mexican sacraficed tacos. the chineese sacraficed noodles. and the american picked up the mexican and chineese and was about to throw them off beacause he had too many of them in their country but then he came to relization that a community with biodiversity is an important factor in life today. i mean, someones gonna have to mow the lawn?

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What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for her birthday? A S.T.D

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ring ring,Who is? you'r face.you'r face how?you'r but hole face.

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4 Jews are killed during a car accident, the whole city mourns over there death and create a plaque in their honor.

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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What do you call a bus full of white people? A Twinky!!!

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"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby" "One's fun to hit with a bat and the other One's a watermelon.

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What happened when the ugly girl asked her crush out on a date? He said yes. He found her personality quite attractive

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Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

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Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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