What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

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If life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

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What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, white and Asian.

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God. God.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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Why is paper white? Cause that's how they make paper.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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I scream, You scream, The police come, It's awkward.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? Same ones he got last year.

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Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

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This Anti-Joke Is Loading Plese Wait . . .

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Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

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http://www.google.com/webhp?doodle=6201726X-hA7spmZ-pmZnpnn__-ynJTMzfAAADUAAAcaZmb9sN8GZmGIzMz9UzM3OmZm2n7__6430pmZuSZmZm___y1yGQYhiElhkGQZBkGYZBiGQZBkGQZBkGQZBkGQZBkGITCGQZBkE4hkGQZRkGIUSGIYhkEEhkGUXiGIXkGIXkGIXkGQXiGQXkGQXiGIZhiGIRiGEZhmE5hhGUViGQYRklohkFohkFpBiFpBkFpBkGQYhmEEhmGQYhJIYhlFkhkGQZFg&hl=en&nord=1 For alien signals

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What do you get when you cross chocolate pudding with your mother's slippers? A spanking.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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What happens when batman jumps off the top of a building? His fake wings fails and he dies upon impact of the ground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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