Guess what? AIDS!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Get off my porch.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops