Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

Who keeps his best friend in a gun rack? a red neck.

There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

What's the difference a ham and bugs bunny? -When I see a ham on the dinner table, I eat it. When I see bugs bunny on the dinner table and asks me "what's up, doc?" I stay away from sugar for a while and get tested for heroin

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

When I find out where you live I'm going to burn down your house, kill your family, and while your crying in you demise I am going to slit your throat.

Suzy:I love you like a fat man love cake. Dave:(proceeds to say nothing as he is fat and is buzzy eating cake)

yo mamma's so fat you're fat too, because it's genetical

Knock Knock Who's there? Immigration. You're headed back to mexico.

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

Roses are Red, violets are blue,love can not tell how much I love you!!

69

Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

Did you know diarrhoea is genetic? It is a side effect of Polycystic Kidney Disease.

A Pakistani news reader.

Whats red and bad for your teeth? Bricks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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