Roses are red violets are blue..... I have normal vision

A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

Yock

What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

The jets are a good team..

Poop.

What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

willie revilame

Knock knock Who's there? Impatient Hellen Keller. Impatient Hellen Keller who? ...

Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

Y u do dis?

Did you hear about the blind man who got stuck by a bus? Poor guy never saw it coming.

Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

what do you call aca that got pushed in a pool ? A WET PUSSY

What do you get when you cross the color pink and pie? A penis ate the answer.

How old is Batman? Old enough to be a bat.

Why do dogs bark? Idk why? Cause there dogs

A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere. -Tag

A kid wanted to change the channel... One thing leads to another.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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