Why do they bury lawyers 10 feet deep? Because deep down they are really good people.

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How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

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Why did the man go to the hospital Because he was hurt

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like to rhyme Microwave.

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam. To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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A- knock knock B- whose there? A- Chuck Norris B- chuck norris who? A- are you retarded?

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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How long does it take a woman to park a car? Shouldn't take long, depends on the size of the parking spot.

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Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

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What did the blind man say to the bartender? Nothing, I forgot to mention he's also mute and has no legs.

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

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What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

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The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

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An overzealous adventurer takes a trip to the Congo in Central Africa. While exploring the dense jungles, he accidentally drinks water that is contaminated with a very rare virus. He lives through the pain of the virus for many years. About 10 years after his trip to Africa, researchers discover a cure for the adventurer's virus. He goes to the clinic to get his shot to kill the virus. Exhilarated, the now cured adventurer runs out of the clinic but fails to look both ways while crossing the street and gets hit by and ambulance and dies.

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Q: what did one kangaroo say too the other kangaroo? A: I was told I am schizophrenic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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