I dont usually get jokes, but when i do I get them.

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Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has has no arms.

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216-409-7176 Call me.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

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What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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Me: Ask my if I'm a secret agent. You: Are you a secret agent? Me: I cannot disclose that information.

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I forgot my joke about gamblers, but i bet you would have loved it!

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What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

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Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

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Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

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Where did the kittens go on their class filed trip? Nowhere, animals are not permitted to enter a museum unless they are eye seeing dogs helping a person who lacks vision.

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A blind, black guy walks into a building. Unfortunately it was a secret KKK building and they beat him, raped him and left him to die. Luckily he was found alive and transported to the hospital. To bad the hospital was bombed by Al Queda.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because lately the posts on "anti-joke.com" have not been anti-jokes. Not even a little.

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This is a joke only for males: Walk into any semi busy public restroom. Stand at the urinal for about 30 seconds to a minute acting as though you cannot find your penis. Make sure you have the attention of at least 2 other urinators and then exclaim quite loudly "I can't find it!" then walk out.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

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cancer

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what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

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Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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