What did the cop say to the black man being arrested? His Miranda rights.

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What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

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What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

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God. God.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? get in the car

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There was an American, Mexican, and a Chineese man, they were all on a plane about to crash. They all threw off the plane somthing they had a lot of in their country before they died. the mexican sacraficed tacos. the chineese sacraficed noodles. and the american picked up the mexican and chineese and was about to throw them off beacause he had too many of them in their country but then he came to relization that a community with biodiversity is an important factor in life today. i mean, someones gonna have to mow the lawn?

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who wants to hear a joke about the broken pencil? to late, its sharpened

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Whats an Anti-joke?? A joke that possesses the kind of humor based on the surprise factor of absence of an expected joke or of a punch line in a narration which is set up as a joke.

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Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

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Soo if ur on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? Pickle.

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What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

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Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

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Why did the baby stop crying? It had been smothered to death by it's sleep- deprived single mother.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Oooh a cloud

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Q: What did ine sweaty arab man say to the other sweaty arab man? A: "I'm sweaty"

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This is a joke only for males: Walk into any semi busy public restroom. Stand at the urinal for about 30 seconds to a minute acting as though you cannot find your penis. Make sure you have the attention of at least 2 other urinators and then exclaim quite loudly "I can't find it!" then walk out.

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

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OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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