knock knock who's there Steve Go away

How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

What did the Pornstar say to his wife? He concluded that a divorce was the way forward for both of them as, seeming as he was a pornstar, he was almost certainly having extra-maritial sexual intercourse, unhealthy for any working relationship.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Roses are blue vilotets are yellow, obviously I don't know this rhyme so well u have aids and will die of cancer at the age of 25, and so will ur mom

Testicles.

What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

What do you call a man who was just struck in the head with a bowling ball? An ambulance would be the most appropriate thing to call since this man just sustained a serious head injury and medical responders should be contacted, lest his brain start hemorrhaging.

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

what did the elephant step on when he was running through the jungle? .... a coke machine.

Knock knock Who's there? Your neighbor. I just ran over your cat.

What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? The victim of a freak genetic mutation and extremely susceptible to predators, meaning it will live a short life in the wilderness.

A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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