Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? the NBA

How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you call a baby that fell in lava Dead

A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

why was the blonde fired from the factory? she ate the maneger's fingers.

this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

What do the Wii, PS3, and Xbox 360 all have in common? None of them will get you laid.

Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

cancer

The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

How do you send Harry Potter a post card? Get an owl to send it to his house.

THUMBS THIS DOWN AND I WILL KILL YOU! TOTAL PEOPLE DIED FROM THUMBING THIS DOWN: 147289347809237489

How do you survive a tornado? You dont.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Bob

Knock knock We aren't home Sorry.

Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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