my shift key is broken1

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

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Why did the plane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot

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1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

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A frenchman, an englishman, and an italian walk into a bar. They proceed to drink their beer in silence, because they can't understand each other one bit.

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A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a toothpick

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scientology.

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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Why did Lance Armstrong lose the race? Which race?

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What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

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Why is the light always red? Because the city has been in an economic depression and does not have the money to fix the traffic light's.

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What do you call a blonde surgeon? Not stereotypical

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for 6 vodka shots. The bartender looks at him in a strange manner. The man quickly downs all 6 of the vodka shots. The bartender looks at the man and says "Jeepers mate, whats the celebration?" The man replies "Well mate, first blow job today" The bartender in a kind gesture says "Here you go mate, next one is one me" while pouring another shot. The man respectfully replies, "No thanks mate, if 6 didn't get the taste away, im sure 7 won't"

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? He graduated at the top of his class with a master's degree in engineering.

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Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

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Q: Whats the longest book in the library A: Understanding Women

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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