What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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That awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it would.

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Apple juice.

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Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

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What's brown and sticky? A Stick

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roses are red violets are blue everyone is stupid how about you? -I'm not Im black

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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Why can no one in africa read or write? I would asume the lack of public education combined with the fact that setting up an education system for so many widespread remote comunities would be a logistical nightmare. But then again I have never been to africa and know little about the country and so the premise of this joke is probably a dramatic overstatement in the first place.

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Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

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A father of four joins the military. He returns home after his service.

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What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

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Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

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Hey, you wanna hear a joke? The holocaust.

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

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Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

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Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

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My arms get tired from carrying my big diick everywhere, well at least it's better than dragging it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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