Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

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Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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What's blue and smells like red paint. ............blue paint.

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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What do chinese people eat? Chinese food.

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Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

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What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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