What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

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What do you get when you cross a hippo with a dishwasher? 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, speaking to a bird would have been considered highly irregular, bordering on insane. He left the bird alone, until the time came to slaughter the bird and take it's nutritious meat.

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Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

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A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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koala's try to hit on teddy bears...... desperate even though we know extinction's comin

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Worlds first anti joke.

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why was sally bleeding? they never buy band-aids over her nubs.

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What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

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What did the pencil say to the pen? Nothing.

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Catholicism.

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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you know what they say, Big man, Big hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, shame he died

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me to.

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I like my coffe like my women Without a Penis

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Billy Mays and Michael Jackson are up in Heaven, because they died recently.

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Q: Why did the policeman stare at the big-breasted victim? A: She was dead.

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A black man,a Hispanic man, and a white man are in a race. The white man wins because he took steroids and used somebody else's urine for the drug test.

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How does the black, high school kid get his new clothes, IPod and nikes? By working at his family-owned convenient store with his father and grandfather every night after school, but not until his homework is done.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

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whats better than holocaust...911 cardiac?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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