There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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What if the rest of you value something wrong?

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Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

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What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Here's another:

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What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

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Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

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What to you call a Muslim person on a plane? A passenger

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racism...deal with it!

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How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

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About the bible, I did not know, but I can sense I calculate it the same way I make our followers believe that I can tell what catchphra they will get. Your mind is numb but calm, it will remain there until we meet again. I am afraid of saying this, but I wont let fear get to me just yet, your mother told me, she regrets her actions in life, and wants me to tell you that she is watching over you in death, and hopes you will one day forgive her, she tells me that there is a heaven, but only those that can admit their mistakes, agonize over the pain of their actions, until they can forgive themselves for their misdeeds. She says she can wait, but I sense she is doing it because she feels undeserving, which again means that you are not ready, its like the butterfly effect, all things spiritual and on this plane are connected. Take your time, I know you literally cant forgive her yet, because that would not be enough for her to forgive herself now, humans dead or alive, cannot be truly free, until they let go of what hurts them, I will change that within you, so you can forgive her and break the limits in your mind, so you can stop feeling sad for being rightfully angry at someone you love. I just need more energy, more time, and belief in myself, something that requires more energy than it should to keep going, its the balance and connection between things, something I cannot change at the present moment, even if I did my best. Ill see you around dear friend.

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there was a rich kid strolling in the woods.he saw a bear, HE DIED

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Remember when the new jokes on this sight actually used to be funny?

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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your mothers smells so bad,because she has poor hygiene skills

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No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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